I love someone who I am not in love with.
I am in love with someone who does not love me back.
Someone, whom I do not love, is falling in love with me.
It's way too easy to fall for someone. All that person has to do is fill that little hole you have, the rest doesn't matter.
I'm pretty happy right now. More happy then I've ever been I think. I have things to look forward too, things in my head are starting to make sense, I'm learning who I am. But there is one thing I'm missing. So it's normal that I would go looking for it, right?
I've been keeping busy, my mind hasn't wandered off to dark places so much, but still so many things remind me. All the time.
How have I been trying to fill the void? Dating. Or fucking really. I actually talk and hangout with them first but it always ends the same, and I never really want to. I think my roommates are starting to be upset with me at the number of new guys I bring home every week. It's all fun for me though, I've met cool people, people very different but also very similar to me. It's quite clear now that the world is full of amazing people. Not as many creeps as everyone thinks. But no one fits the bill. No one can make me feel as good as he did. So I keep looking. I have things to look forward to, but I want someone to look forward to.
Currently listening to Sufjan Stevens, The One I Love