Saturday, June 5, 2010

I'm a Slave 4 You

A couple of days ago a little Asian man with a cap knocked at my work place. I opened the door to let him in thinking he was a client, but little did I know...

Asian man: Hello, My name is Robert and I have my c.v here for you.

Stone Fox: Oh....okay..? ( I work in a place where only women and mostly young hot ones apply for jobs, but I decided to listen to what he had to say...)

As I start reading the piece of paper he handed me, he reads it out loud with me. Here is what it read:

My name is robert (Robert without a capital "r"..hmm.. okay...). I am a slave that works in different salons to serve the women. The princesses give me what they want in "tip" form.

What I do:
- Clean floors
- Clean towels, fold and put away
- Carry grocery bags
- Wash the bathrooms
- Do the dishes
- Cook
- Wash clothes and iron
- waiter
- Take out the trash
- Wash cars
- Wax your boots and shoes
- Run errands
- Foot massage on demand ( I love this. Everything else is expected of him but the massage in on demand only!)

References will be given if asked.

And then his phone number and email which translates to

As we finish reading the "c.v" TOGETHER, he doesn't give me a second to speak (although I'm not sure what I would have said.) and goes on to get on his knees, put his hands together and beg me to let him be a servant to the princesses. I told him no, we do not need a slave here and it's against the rules anyway ( this is another story..). He quickly replied back with another plea, this one more passionate, to absolutely need to be submissive to princesses. I said listen, I'll speak with the girls and then I have your number here so I will call you if we need your services. Now I guess my answer wasn't good enough for him so he takes his little lunch box I saw him carrying on his shoulder and opens it:

Asian Man: " Here, to show you I am completely serious about this. ( He pulls out a little metal stand as his eyes fill up with water..poor man.. but what is he doing..? Oh wait a minute! I just got back from Turkey and saw a whole bunch of these there! He's not actually gonna....? Argh! Really?!)

Stone Fox: No Robert, it's okay. I don't need my shoes shined. They are new anyway. You really don't need to do this. I really, truly believe you when you say you are serious. I said we'll call you after we make a decision so please get up and...

Asian Man: No! Please Princess Stone Fox!! I need to work to feel okay. I need to be submissive to the princesses! I can bring you coffee?! ( and he says all this as I am walking towards the door and he is following me on his knees struggling to shine the little white spot off my right shoe)

After a few more minutes of me asking him to leave, he finally does so.

Yesterday I get a call from my slave and he asks me what I like to drink, and If I like fruit. I say I drink only water, tap water and am allergic to food. So this morning he shows up at the door with a water bottle and a bag of fresh fruits.

I'm not too sure what to do with him.

Currently listening to Death Cab for Cutie, Bixby Canyon Bridge


  1. Hey there!

    No way this story is real, right? If so that's frickin hilarious! Send him my way- I have no problem having old asian-man slaves. Wait.. I'm not a princess though. Hope that won't be a problem.

    Nice blog, btw. Hope you don't mind having a reader!

  2. Hey! Amazing lol no I don't mind, it's great :)

    This story is certainly true. I kept his c.v and showed my friends because they also didn't believe me. You're pretty enough to pass off as a princess. I'll let him know you're interested...!

  3. And tell him to hustle up, too. My shoes don't shine themselves.

  4. Hello from Colorado and new follower. You are indeed Princes Stone Fox. Is this the first time something like this happened to you? Probably won't be the last. I look forward to more posts.